How to Deal With a Partner Who’s Obsessed With Her Appearance
You made the bed, and now you have to lie in it.
Unfortunately, it’s near impossible to change a narcissist. Because she’s used to fretting over herself in front of the mirror, it’s going to take more than therapy and telling her “You look perfect to me” to solve her body image issues.
And let’s face it. You may have fallen for your partner’s overall personality, but it was her beautiful appearance that attracted you first. You love her as a person, but you cannot deny that her pretty face is a bonus.
So how should you deal with her?
Obsessing over your looks is a clear sign of insecurity and a need to please other people. I don’t need to tell you how unhealthy that is. It doesn’t just ruin her mental health, but it can also destroy your relationship.
1. Seek professional help.
This obsession obviously stems from somewhere. Some people grew up being bullied simply because of how unattractive they were. And when they finally got a handle on their appearance, they became obsessed with their looks.
That needs to be addressed, otherwise, it will be an ongoing problem. If you plan on having a family with her, she’s going to have an issue with it, arguing the physical side-effects of pregnancy. It’s best to talk to her and then seek out a professional for help.
2. Limit her access to social media.
Most of her self-obsession comes from the validation she gets on social media. If she keeps posting hot selfies of herself, people will see it and compliment her. Just think of how she will react to a negative comment from a jealous netizen.
Apps like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and so on have been the main cause for people going into depression the past couple of years. That much exposure to thousands of warring opinions is going to ruin the younger generation.
Social media isn’t bad, per se, but too much of it is asking for trouble.
3. Give her reassurance.
Some girls who are insecure about how they look will not take kindly to compliments from those closest to them. They will respond with “No, I’m fat” and “I’m not pretty, just look at…”, further dismissing your words. If your girl is like that, you will need to do №1 even more.
If she’s the type to get incredibly quiet and awed whenever someone compliments her, there is still hope. You can keep her insecurities at bay by giving her genuine reassurances. Sometimes sincere words from a lover are enough.
Know When to Cut Your Losses
You can help her, but you can’t fix her.
People need to fix themselves before getting into relationships. Your partner isn’t there to fix you, they’re there to enhance you as a person. You are supposed to complement your partner and vice versa.
If she constantly needs reassurance or refuses your help, all you can do is help yourself. You won’t be happy if you keep waiting on her hand and foot.
You’ve done all you can. Know when to cut your losses.
